In honor of World Breastfeeding Week, I wanted to dig around our old blogs for this particular topic and re-post it. For many women, breastfeeding can be a touchy subect. One end of the spectrum are the avid pro-breastfeeders who throw stones at those choosing “unnatural milk”; the other end having women who’ve never thought once about breastfeeding and made the (not always educated) decision to never even try. Luckily for me and most of the gals I run with, we all stand together somewhere in the middle and work DAILY to not pass judgement on any mother who falls in between. (Please note: I have no intentions of sitting around a campfire holding hands and singing Kumbaya so if- for whatever reason- this post offends you, I’ll preface by saying this is how I felt and feel about the subject with no goals of trying to “make everyone happy!”)
Since I started working on research and development for this website, I have started to sit up and take notice more often of the things people say and their reactions to various situations…namely breastfeeding! While I understand there are MANY views on breastfeeding – and I’m okay with everyone having their own opinion, a large part of my heart is hoping that what I’m doing, in some small way, will help bring everyone to somewhat of a commonplace.
I had my daughter when I was 23 years old – I didn’t go into my pregnancy, delivery, or first year with her with any sort of plan… As crazy as that may sound, I’m the type of person who lives by the phrase “go with the flow.” I didn’t have my heart set on nursing, but I thought I’d give it a try since it seemed like the natural thing to do. (And by natural, I mean by breasts produced milk to feed my offspring… since I had no say in that bodily preparation, I felt like I should at least try and do what my body was working so hard for!) It was nothing at all like I thought it would be – it was awkward in the beginning and I never knew how much milk I was making, it was very confusing. On top of everything else, I felt like I could never leave the house because I wasn’t ABOUT to walk my fat, after-baby lumpiness around a mall with a baby hanging out of my bra!!
Luckily for me, the baby bug had bitten about 5 of my friends at the same time, so between all of us I learned a few tricks and things to help me along the way! I found out REALLY early that there really wasn’t a comfortable nursing bra for me, (sorry nursing bra makers but it’s the TRUTH! I tried about 15 before I gave up!!) so I started wearing nursing camisoles under my shirts. Sure, layering isn’t the coolest option for July in Texas, but it made me feel SO comfortable because: 1) I didn’t have underwire! YES!, & 2) I could sneak a baby under my shirt and get her latched on in about 15 seconds flat without showing any skin what-so-ever!
I’m the girl who has nursed while eating lunch in a restaurant, the lady pushing the empty stroller and cradling a nursing baby, I’ve walked through almost every single retail store you can think of holding my child in my arms or a sling and nursing them and have never even heard a complaint. I know that I’m one of the lucky ones, as most nursing moms have had one sort of confrontation or another from not-so-breastfeeding-friendly people. Here lies another reason for my creation of this website… if moms have a list of places that are nursing-friendly or better yet, have private nursing rooms – they’ll be a lot less likely to have scrutinizing eyes question their motives for feeding their babies in public places. What if a mother doesn’t want to try nursing because she is too modest to nurse in public and she doesn’t want to be confined to her home? Well, now I have answer for her (and it includes our web address!). If, in some small way, we help ANYONE who is uncomfortable nursing in public, has a loud GULPING eater (like BOTH of mine!), or has a curious baby with a tendency to tear down the tent of a nursing cover…. I’ll feel like I’ve done something worthwhile.
Don’t misunderstand my position on breastfeeding, I’m okay with whatever works best for everyone, as I said earlier – “go with the flow…” I never really thought about when I’d start weaning, I just waited until the day I decided we weren’t going to nurse anymore… for my daughter, that was when she was 6 months old – and my son, it was when he was 9 months old. I got so tired of tangling with a distracted baby and had so many things going on - but I must say I have never thought twice about my decision. I have friends who have nursed past 18 months old as well as friends who tried (and HATED) breastfeeding – and I try to make sure a little of my easy-going nature gets passed on to them…
You should never feel guilt for stopping breastfeeding, ever… especially if it was an unpleasant experience for you. All children are different, as we all know, and though medical and psychological studies show various facts supporting both breastfed and formula-fed babies, I really think the best way to take care of yourself and your child is do what YOU are comfortable with. If you’re unsure about breastfeeding at all, talk to a lactation consultant or browse through helpful breastfeeding websites like www.kellymom.com to get the answers you need. The more you know, the easier it is to make an educated decision on wether or not to breastfeed and how long…
So, yes… I like to think of myself as a breastfeeding guru; I happened to love breastfeeding both of my kids and I still want to learn about everything I can to try and help other nursing mothers when they come across a problem! I also REALLY enjoyed getting my body back to myself after having my son and feel like you don’t have to be a “Nursing Nazi” to fully support breastfeeding! My hope is that a mother will come across this website and feel a little more comfort knowing if she wants to nurse in a private room with a locked door, in the backseat of her car, or in the middle of Mardi gras – she can do whatever she wants and we’re here to help!
::: Michelle
The Mom Squad
Tags: baby, Breastfeeding, bye bye with baby, child, formula-feeding, motherhood, nursing, nursing room locator, pro-breastfeeding
what a wonderful post! =) I nursed my daughter until 13 months. Whenever we have a second baby, I’ll nurse him/her for as long as I can. I do feel that women should give it a good try, because NOTHING beats the closeness and sweetness and bonding nursing brings (for me at least). BUT I agree, it’s not for everyone, and for whatever the reason, women need to be educated about it. The one thing that bothers me most is when i hear that a women chose NOT to breastfeed because “it sounded like a pain” or because a bottle is “soo much easier”. Really? what’s easier than rolling over at 3 am and popping a boob? LOL
okay.. seriously – this is a wonderfully written post, and the bottom line is we all need to be less judgmental of each other and more supportive as mothers. we all just want what is best for our kids, and just as what’s best for me is different than whats best for my sister, the same thing oes for our kids. Everyone is different.
Great post! I just wish that health care providers were more open or even required to educate and promote breastfeeding. I think it would be a good idea to have a breastfeeding mother go in and help new moms after they give birth. There is nothing like haveing someone who has been there and done it to give you the confidence and push to be succesful. But if it isn’t your thing it just isn’t…there should be more assistance and acceptance in our society so more women feel comfortable with their choice.
Thanks for this post!
I breastfed my son, Avery for about 5 weeks. I loved breastfeeding and I think my problem was I tried too hard and stressed about it. He turned into a screaming child at 4 weeks. He would nurse on each breast for 30 minutes each, scream for 30 minutes, and then sleep for 30 minutes. It was a viscious cycle that was tearing me apart. I finally pumped before his feeding and I only got 15cc from each breast!!! Talk about FRUSTRATING!! I was devistated! The only thing I wanted to do was to breastfeed and do it successfully. I felt like I had failed at the only thing a mother could do for her child. It was horrible.
Will I do it again? YES! Most definately! Who’s to say that it won’t be totally different the second time around? So with #2–hopefully—sometime next year, no I’m not prego yet, it will be a success!
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